like Penelope

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Probably the most embarrassing poem I ever wrote
contained the phrase wet with longing. I meant odyssey and oceanI meant sweatdrenched with emotionwedding-dress and winding sheetboth blue with love and bloodunwinding every night, tearing up.Sleeping alone in that immovable bedin the blue moonlight supersaturatedthat sweetness you get in your teeth when you drink winethat sweetness you get in your eyes when you almost cry because of clouds or somethingthat sweetness behind your knees when you're doing that hamstring exerciseand when you see a boy in the hall and you see his eyes seem to change color with the lightand it's like now I am wearing this blue mantle of desire
but it's late and you're not home and there's no blue seaand it's still not the right occasion for that poem but I'm unraveling everything I can and the skin's coming away from my fingersand every sound and smell and temperaturecarries an omen like a fine mist